Ay Mijita ✨ Embrace your raíces. Reclaim your esencia.
My personal journey of transformation in body, mind and spirit. Sharing life events and hard lessons learned to break free from the cultural Mexican-American limiting beliefs as first born generation in the United States. A glimpse into healing my generational wounds through holistic modalities through emotional intelligence, astrology, self care and tools learned. Join me on facing adversities of moving through to get on the other side. Inspiring others to be the best version of themselves and walking away from the perfectionism trap.
Ay Mijita ✨ Embrace your raíces. Reclaim your esencia.
Breaking Cycles: A First-Gen Latina's Healing Journey
What happens when a first-generation Mexicana raised on "echarle ganas" finally stops abandoning herself? When the body breaks down from carrying too much? When ancestral wisdom starts whispering louder than cultural conditioning?
Welcome to the raw, unfiltered journey of Dora Alicia Praxedis—intuitive healer, life coach, and proud first-gen daughter of Tamaulipas immigrants. From growing up as a five-year-old caretaker in Chicago's suburbs to navigating teen pregnancy, perfectionism, and the relentless drive to blend in, Dora Alicia's story mirrors what many children of immigrants experience but rarely discuss.
The turning point came through physical breakdown—a herniated disc at 30 that forced her to stop numbing with 16-hour workdays and truly feel. This physical crisis, followed by her father's passing and the pandemic, initiated a profound spiritual awakening. Through working with life coaches, shamans, and reconnecting with practices reminiscent of her grandmother's limpias, Dora Alicia discovered that healing isn't just about fixing what's broken—it's about reclaiming what was always there.
"Ay Mijita" exists as a love letter to first-gen personas carrying invisible weight, those asking "why am I like this?" and seeking connection beyond survival. Future episodes will explore boundaries, generational trauma, ancestral healing, and the spiritual tools that help us return home to ourselves. Whether you're struggling with people-pleasing, perfectionism, or the complex dance between cultures, this podcast offers both medicine and mirror.
Hit follow, share with your comadres, and join a healing comunidad where we can all embrace our raices and reclaim our esencia together.
Email: dora@dorapraxedis.com
Follow Dora on Instagram @dpraxedis
Check out the website: www.dorapraxedis.com
Hola, hola, welcome to Ay Mijita. Embrace your Raices, reclaim your Essencia. I'm your host, Dora Alicia Praxedis, intuitive healer, first-gen Latina and life coach, here to walk with you on this healing journey. This podcast is a sacred space to unpack generational wounds, reclaim your voice and reconnect with your inner wisdom. In today's first episode, I want to share my own story, the real, raw moments that shaped my path and why this podcast exists for personas like you. I'm so glad you're here and I can't wait to embark on this journey together. Hola, hola, and welcome to I Mi Hijita, embracing your Roots. I'm your host, Dor Alicia Praxedis, intuitive healer, life coach, mama, hija hermana and proud first- gen Mexicana doing the deeper inner work to break generational cycles and reconnect with my true self. This podcast is for you. Who's ever asked yourself why am I like this? Because deep down, you know there's more to your story than just survival. Here we dive into the messy, the magical, the medicine of healing, from inner child work to energetic limpias, astrology to ancestral wisdom, human design to hard boundaries. I share my lived experiences to hard boundaries. I share my lived experiences, spiritual tools and teachable moments, all with corazón y honestidad. So grab your cafecito tecito or that bubbly drink you love. And let's get into today's episode, porque tu historia, tu voz y tu healing matter.
Dora:Well, where do we start? Well, from my early childhood, I was born as a first generation Mexicana daughter in Chicago, and my parents came from Tamaulipas, Mexico, so shout out to all the fam. And my mom was actually pregnant with me when she was seven months, and that's where we they migrated over here and came to live with the tios, and that was something that, for me, was such a story because, for the number of years my mom always told me they came in a plane. And so, growing up in the Chicago West suburbs, in Schaumburg area Des Plaines, we lived in a trailer park for a number of years and then we moved over to Schaumburg where I went to kindergarten, and that's when I started realizing I needed to blend in. There was majority of white classmates and so for me, being the only Mexicana there or Latina for that matter Growing up in Roselle, after I switched schools in first grade, I was able to then get into the groove, let's say, of school, and my parents always worked all the time, so it was something to get used to.
Dora:I am the oldest of three siblings, all girls, and so my poor dad growing up with all girls, his whole life in one bathroom, was not easy. At one point we did have quite a bit of families living with us in a three-bedroom, one-bath house in Roselle on Irving Park and growing up we always knew that for me it was very embedded that I needed to speak English and no accent. So I do speak Spanish. Me encanta más el español porque es el lenguaje del amor, I say. And ever since I was younger we always had like this revolving door of babysitters, because whoever was home that's the person that would feed you. And so at a very young age, like around five, my parents since they always worked I became the babysitter for my younger sisters. So can you imagine a five-year-old going to kindergarten but then taking care of her younger sisters? And so we were very tight-knit and it was such a pressure to be responsible, right Like to protect my sisters, to make sure that the other people were kind of keeping their line and I was keeping our line. I remember there was this one babysitter that we fought over chips and someone ended up dragging one of my sisters through the living room by her hair. That was not cool. So again, there was a lot of things that happened during childhood that made me and shaped me into realizing I had to be responsible, I had to be like this grown person when in reality, I was just wanting to live my childhood, growing up.
Dora:My parents were always fearful of the outside world. I think my dad instilled that in us, that you don't trust anybody. The only people that you trust is your family, your blood, and so there was a lot of pressure around being perfect for me. So there was a lot of pressure around being perfect for me. I think it was instilled that I had to perform like do the grades be smart, because that's all that was my job. I had to go to school and come back home, take care of my sisters, and I didn't really do any extracurricular activities such as sports, and that because of the childhood that I had, because of the childhood that I had, I just felt that was enough and I didn't know better. And so for me, emotionally, when I would feel down, my parents would probably say just suck it up and go to your room, kind of thing, and compose yourself.
Dora:For me, one method of my releasing is crying. So I would just cry unconsolably. And if I knew I was getting in trouble. That was the other thing. I did not want to disappoint my parents. That was such a big thing for me growing up and don't get me wrong, my parents, they're very hardworking people.
Dora:I remember my dad would get up at four in the morning, go to do this breakfast gig in the morning, then go to work his full-time job and then get out of work like around later in the day and then go to work another job and then come home late at night and there were probably times I never saw him because he worked second shift for such a long time and I did miss that. My mom same thing. She would go to work in the morning, come home, do something quick and then go straight out the door to work her second job, and that was to make ends meet. So we had the life you would say the perfect life. We had the cars, we had the house, we had the everything, the clothes, but for me I really missed out on having that family unit. We did not eat meals together. I don't remember ever eating something together.
Dora:Everybody was kind of come and go and my dad was a very hardworking man and so for me, just when I would go to school I would code switch, like try to fit in, and then coming back home it was finally I would be relaxed. But then when people were around, I felt like I had to perform, like I had to be this responsible person, especially when it came down to my sisters. Like everybody was kind of doing their own thing, so we didn't really have that much of a bond growing up, so if I was feeling sad, I don't feel like I had the opportunity to actually voice that or there wasn't any space for that because, again, everybody was kind of doing their own thing and we spent very limited time together, having this mentality that I always had to perform, please others, especially when it came to my parents, I didn't really have friends, I didn't hang out with them after school, and so for me, family was everything. I did look forward to the weekends, though, because I got to admit like the primos, the tios, like the whole extended family would come over, we would go to someone's house for a cookout and I could see my you know play around with my cousins and that sing around, do karaoke, and that was so fun and so nurturing to have that as a family growing up.
Dora:When I got to high school, that's when things really started to change. I became a rebel, in a way that freshman year in high school, because I wanted to go out and I wanted to not live such a strict life with my parents at home. And fortunately I was able to sneak out and go to the movies, do the things that normal kids my age did. And over the summer of my freshman year, that's when I found my boyfriend and I had dated before, so I kind of knew what I was looking for another person, I guess, but at 16 you're really not thinking. But over that summer we were able to hang out, really bond, and about six months later, that's when I became pregnant, mid through my sophomore year, with my oldest daughter, and telling my parents was a very, very difficult thing.
Dora:When they finally did realize that I was pregnant, I had run away and they made me come back home, because it's illegal to leave your house just like that because I was underage. And I came back home and that's when I realized it gave me a second opportunity that most teen parents don't get, and I did not realize it at the time. But I was living at home and I finished high school. I was very smart kid but not smart enough to know like the unintended consequences of my actions and how they affected everyone. So that was a really big deal at home and that's when I feel like my family started falling apart. All the things that were unknown and been known to us as kids my parents' marriage that's when things started going really, really south and for the longest time I blamed myself. But having that relationship with my mom eventually talking about these things, that's when I realized it wasn't me, it was actually the parents. My mom just never really had that connection with my dad.
Dora:On the love on a romantic level and this was really hard to hear because I always thought people got married because they love each other I actually thought I was going to live out my fairy tale princess story, but with my mom I was able to grow and over this podcast I'll talk about different things, different stories around that, and especially like suffering that teen pregnancy at a young age, how that shaped my life. But for the purposes of today I'll keep it kind of simple. I did graduate high school and then I went on to college and then I'm still married to my now husband. So this year we'll be together for 23 years and it sounds beyond me that we've spent that much time together over half my life. And so there's all these different things that I had to learn along the way. So, feeling the shame, the guilt, the I'm less than, the worthlessness, the depression, that anxiety that everybody's looking at me, that really did happen, and so those are the things that we'll definitely touch upon this podcast and all that journey that I went through to uncover some of those things and how I was able to shift that mindset.
Dora:Well, eventually I got a job and I went to school for accounting and I thought I had to go to school for something that I really needed to excel at, and math is my jam and I fortunately did internships in that and accounting and I knew, like in high school and over my college, when I landed my first real job, I say I was very fortunate because I've been there for over 15 years now and I wanted to perform and all these things that I was suffering, let's say, at home, or encountering at home this conditioning that you need to do your best, you need to hustle, you need to work hard, and those are the strong work ethic that my parents instilled in us, which I appreciate, but it does have its flaws. It's always was like echarle ganas, tienes que siempre hacerlo mejor. But it was more of like this reprimanding thing if you didn't perform, if you're not performing, it comes across as oh es flojo, no te gusta trabajar. And so I didn't want to be like that. So when I would go to work, there was this point in time in my life where I would work no joke like 16 hours a day. I would wake up at five in the morning, go to sleep like at two or three in the morning just to be able to get my work done. And at work, I didn't realize oh well, if Dora is doing all this stuff, let's just give her more. And it was great.
Dora:But I was pretty much like gnawing at myself. I wasn't spending time with my family, and I later realized that what I was doing was actually numbing with work. I wanted to keep busy, and until I suffered this back injury in 2018, when I turned 30, I feel like when you turn 30, everything breaks down. O sea, ya, no, es lo mismo. And that's when my back went out.
Dora:I actually had a herniated disc, so I used to work out all the time and I worked out six days a week and I did Zumba, which was my favorite, and jumping around and doing all these thingsumba, which was my favorite, and jumping around and doing all these things, and you know twisting and turning, and I stopped doing it for about two, three months because of the holidays and whatnot happenings at home. Personally, I went back to Zumba with that same intensity and guess what my body was like uh-uh, girl, you're not going to do that. And I ended up in the hospital for about three days and that's when I took my mental break. Let's just say I started realizing that life does not revolve only around work and for me, I thought I was work like being the accountant. That's my identification, that's my like. My whole world revolved around that, instead of asking myself what do I like, what do I like to do on my free time.
Dora:So during that back injury, obviously I couldn't even walk for two weeks. It was that's how intense it was and I was in so much excruciating pain, me dolia, todo mi cintura, everything, and I needed to slow down. And that's the first time I actually began to feel like, feel what was happening. And I knew intuitively there was some sort of shift happening with myself, that I was starting to realize how I needed to mature and I was not going to be immortal, like one day I was actually going to die. So, having all these deep thoughts and thinking I'm going to be paralyzed my whole life, like what, what am I going to do with myself? And I didn't realize that at the time. But now I know that when you're about 28 to 31 in life, you go through this moment where you have like an existential crisis, like you're trying to figure out what do you want to do for the rest of your life. Is this where you see yourself like your trajectory of life? And sitting with all those like all that, all those thoughts with painkillers and feeling that much pain, all the emotional and spiritual healing that would be happening and it would unfold in the coming years.
Dora:It wasn't only my pain, but it was also our family pain and over the course of this podcast I'll definitely get into some of those things that have happened and transpired. But one of the biggest things was my dad. He ended up passing away in 2019 from heart disease and that was really hard to endure Physically. I was realizing that my body was holding on to a lot of unprocessed trauma pain that I had on my body. I was also, let's just say, a little overweight and I've also struggled with that all my life and that's why I would hit the gym so hard, because I thought, okay, I'm just going to go to the gym and I'm going to be able to all my life. And that's why I would hit the gym so hard, because I thought, okay, I'm just going to go to the gym and I'm going to be able to maintain my weight.
Dora:But every time I would yo-yo between like 170 pounds to 220 was my max, and I'm not going to lie, food is my comfort. I love food, like my husband, my kids and I are foodies, so we love to eat, we love everything for the most part, and it's become something that we bond over. So, for my body, obviously, there are certain things that don't agree. Now, as you get older, you start learning like hmm, maybe the chorizo is not so good for you, right, because me, da gruras and I'm paying for it later. And knowing these different things like about yourself, you're learning, right, you're embracing yourself. You, about yourself, you're learning, right, you're you're embracing yourself, you're learning that you know this is the norm and when we go to my mom's house to eat, like everybody has that huevito con chorizo, but I actually hold off on it because I know I'm going to be paying for it later, especially that spicy salsa that she makes my gosh it's. You know, that thing will clean you out. Eso en si es una limpia and very sacred, definitely on the potty.
Dora:So that's where listening to the body was one of the biggest lessons that I've learned with especially my back pain. Recovering from that took me 18 months. I did a lot of physical therapy, saw a lot of doctors, got the injections, did a minor like procedure there that burned all the nerves around that area and I was able to recover slowly but surely. And I was able to recover slowly but surely and I do keep up with it. I go to my chiropractors. There's other things that have come up medically that I go out to the doctor and just make sure that everything's checked out. I want to keep that longevity, I want to see my kids grow up and I one day want to see my grandkids, if they so choose, to have kids, and those are all the different things that kind of crossed my mind.
Dora:So, thinking about the future right, and that was something for the past eight years. I've embarked on this journey of like. Why am I the way? Why am I the way I am? Or what are my limiting beliefs? What holds me back? Why do I want to be this perfectionist, you know, like I always call it my Beyonce syndrome, because I want to be perfect and I care for what other people think, even though I say I don't, but I really do. And most people tell me that, oh, tienes una confianza y todo. But that confidence doesn't come on easy. I do have to try in the way of like, pep myself, you know, pep myself up, and I realized that I would beat myself up with words Like, you know, it is an appendage, like all these things like from childhood kind of coming up in my mind. I thought that's what I am right, that's what I identify myself as. But no, like, in the mornings I actually have my rituals, I do talk to myself and I'm like no, you did a good job, you're doing the best you can. And that's what kept me going. And with this back injury, that's when I realized that I had lost my connection with God. So every time I feel like and I am like.
Dora:When I was clinically depressed during my pregnancies, I realized that I just lost myself completely in that darkness, that I lost God. I didn't find him. I thought I was alone. But actually I was just going through a season in my life that I needed to kind of do it on my own, to know and realize how love and compassion work, cause I was definitely not loving compassionate with myself. I am with others. Like, ask yourself this question Would you treat others the same way you treat yourself Like? Would you actually say some of those things that you say in your head to yourself? Would you call someone else like, say, your best friend, a pendejo? Like seriously, if you know, or your nephew or niece? Would you actually say those things to them? I probably most likely than not, no, because those are very hurtful things, but we actually do it to ourselves. So that was one of the biggest lessons as well, that I would sit with myself and think out loud.
Dora:So on a day to day, we carry so much weight just with our thoughts, our emotions, our feelings, and sometimes I would just say, oh, I'm too busy, I don't have time to think about that right now, or I don't have time to be sad right now. I need to work, I need to get this done, and life should not be that way. You should take a moment if you can right. Obviously, if you have meetings or if you have commitments, you have to probably get through those first, but it takes you about five minutes. Go to the bathroom, sit on that potty, calm yourself down, breathe four in four counts in, hold it for four, four counts out and regulate your system, your nervous system, emotional regulation and intelligence, I've learned, is an actual thing, so we'll dive into that in this podcast Now.
Dora:Following the thread on that healing journey of mine, that's when I started realizing reading the Bible, following spirit, being more in tune with my body. Then I had some intuition and I started listening to a podcast that talked about, like, emotionally, what's going on there. And then, of course, in 2020, covid hit and that's when I started really delving deep into some of these things. I started geeking out on astrology, human design, and there was something that I would remember my mom and my grandma would do of a limpia with an egg, and that's how I was able to find my shaman and go to some classes, but then also go through the motions of finding other mentors, teachers, about just following my intuition, and that's when I started tapping into the Akashic Records. I did a program for about 18 months that I could tap in and open those records and have this like limitless space and have spirit come through, and it's such a sacred practice for me to sit with myself but then also connect with higher self and the divine.
Dora:One of the biggest investments I did was hire a life coach and I thought maybe I want to be a life coach in the future and I obviously have to kind of practice what you preach. So I hired a life coach and she was super spiritual. She taught me so much, especially when it came to handling and managing my emotions, especially when it came to handling and managing my emotions, and this happened like a year before my dad passed away. So uncovering and unearthing some of those things, being able to be at peace with my dad, being able to forgive so much and talk about things on my side, but not necessarily with him is that forgiveness right? The accepting my dad for who he was and how he was, and also home life, like being that mom showing up as a mom that I wanted to be, be present instead of working so much.
Dora:And then with my husband, I wanted to be a better wife. I wanted to be able to connect with him. We would fight constantly. There was a lot of things that we wouldn't be able to resolve. I would always be worried about money. I was worried about being fat and my medical conditions as well, because it didn't really help my back injury, and so I wanted to become and I wanted to get back to it. And having a life coach was something was a biggest investment for me on all levels, not only financially. It ended up starting to switch over my life because I started changing as a mom. I started changing as a wife with my husband, because I was starting to pay attention. I became like active listener versus trying to figure out what I'm going to say next. So essentially, my relationship with others completely changed.
Dora:There was a lot of turbulent moments, let's say, with my sisters as well, and working with all these mentors, coaches, shaman, therapists and curanderos, I was able to start tapping into a gift that I have that I didn't realize that I had. Which we all do have, is intuition and connection to that divine, to God, to spirit, to the universe, and being able to manifest and focus, like wherever your mind focuses. That's what you're going to manifest more of, and I didn't realize how powerful that was. Some people call it the law of attraction and they identify it as that, but there's just how we're all interconnected in a way and how your actions matter, like you don't know who's watching, but someone's watching you, someone is looks up to you and someone wants to be like you, and not that everything you do.
Dora:But if somebody copies you, it's actually a good thing. I was taught growing up it's like oh, you're such a poser, you know eres bien copion, and you know it's actually a good thing. I was taught growing up it's like oh, you're such a poser, you know eres bien copión. And you know, quieres hacer todo como yo. But that competitiveness, that's actually a good thing, that's healthy competition, because we're all elevating, we're all celebrating ourselves. And some people don't see it that way and, to be honest, I really cared what other people thought, especially in high school when you know so-and-so, had like this nice looking purse or whatnot, and I wanted it too. But that's where in after all this like journeying through, finding and learning so much more to life than just the material, that's what really caused me to stop abandoning myself and started coming home to myself.
Dora:Like who am I? Like who? What do I feel? Why am I feeling this? And like digging into it a little deeper? Because, essentially, we want to be able to live in this duality of darkness and light, the good and the bad, the positive and the negative. There always has to be some balance, and so my goal on a daily is to be back to neutral, because, essentially, you don't want to be muy up there, muy, muy, ni tan tan, right Back down in the low. You want to go back to neutral because you want to be able to celebrate and you want to also feel those emotions that are negative, because there is balance in this world. So, essentially, covid made me look more into myself, right, sit with myself, look inward and really understand why I am the way I am. Why am I wired through human design and astrology? Those are all indicators and just gives me more information. But it's confirmation of who I am and claiming myself and where I'm coming from. And if I'm able to understand myself, I'm also able to understand others, and that was probably another lesson in epiphany that I learned was accepting myself gives others permission to accept themselves as well.
Dora:So why this podcast? I created this podcast because I wish there was somebody out there that I could bond with over in my story, and I also would love this to be a love letter to those first-gen personas carrying this invisible weight, to know that there's more to life than just going through the motions and living like a zombie, that, instead of suppressing all the different emotions, that we are able to process them and live a healthy life for all, for the wellness and longevity. And so, as a mujer wearing various hats in my life all for the wellness and longevity. And so, as a mujer wearing various hats in my life, there's a lot to unpack there, and so, hopefully, through my stories and the different tools that I use, either you're able to walk away with this with so much more knowledge and wisdom, and or we work together, maybe in the future and that would be amazing too. And so this is a space to explore your roots, reclaim your truth and reconnect with your essence, and that's something that I want to push forward. I want it to be a movement. I want you to be the best version of yourself every day, and so you'll hear solo episodes, guest stories, tools for emotional healing, spiritual insights and, of course, chisme de corazon, and so these topics will definitely include boundaries, generational trauma, ancestral healing relationships, spiritual tools and personal power. So hopefully, you definitely stay tuned, because there's so much more that we're going to embark on this journey together.
Dora:Now, something I love to do every day, or when I think of it as a practice, is pull a card from one of my oracle decks, and so this one is from Guides of the Hidden Realms, oracle from Colette Barron-Reed, and this morning and this message is probably for someone listening and for myself included is card number 30, enough for now and always. The key concepts here are you are enough, worthiness, having what you need, faith in needs being met, our need for emotional and intellectual nourishment, and asking for help and getting it. So this card speaks on. It's an amazing feeling to truly understand your needs in life and trust they will be met. When you have healthy self-esteem, you know you are worthy of the gifts the universe has bestowed on you and you comfortably hold space for your success. Your hard work, focus and energy are leading you to a fulfilling, abundant experience.
Dora:This is also a reminder that no one person can meet all of another's needs. A romantic partner may meet certain needs, while friends and family are needed for others to be fulfilled. Reflect on how much you're giving to others and whether you may be depleting yourself. You are not the unlimited source of someone's be depleting yourself. You are not the unlimited source of someone's, of anyone's supply. It is okay to ask for help, in fact, expect to receive it. You are worthy and help is always available. You are in a time of a win-win. Focus on nourishing yourself with experiences that bring you joy. Doing so will give you the energy and knowledge to then nourish others.
Dora:So for me, this card just represents that having the attitude of being able to receive is such a big gift, having that help, because we can't do it on ourselves or by ourselves. We need to go through this journey of life together and collectively. We are all helping and lifting each other up, and so work on. If you have issues or trouble, kind of receiving, like I have in the past. I thought I had to be the chingona right, the one that needed to keep going and do it all on my own, but not knowing that you have a whole tribe behind you, all these people that love you and nurture you Just déjate querer, déjate amar. You have a whole tribe behind you, all these people that love you and nurture you. Just déjate querer, déjate amar and love yourself in the process too. So just learn to accept all those things that are coming your way. Everybody has a blessing, and sometimes it's really crappy blessing, like it's a very shitty situation, but it could be very beautiful as well. So learn to accept and embrace it all and definitely going to sit with this card a little bit more and see how it unfolds for me today and how it unfolds for you. I'm kind of curious. Gracias for being here with me. If my story resonated, I invite you to keep tuning in. This is just the beginning. We're diving deep into healing culture and reclaiming who we are. Hit the follow button, share this with your comadres and DM me what part of the story landed for you on Instagram at dpraxedis.
Dora:Next week's episode is all about the generational wounds we carry as first gen personitas in este mundo and how they show up in our daily lives. Te veo pronto, cariño y recuerda. Embrace your raices, reclaim your esencia. Gracias por acompañarme, cariño. I hope this episode offered you a moment of connection with your story, your ancestors, or maybe even a part of yourself you've forgotten connection with your story, your ancestors, or maybe even a part of yourself you've forgotten. Remember, healing isn't linear. Sometimes it's a whisper, a boundary, a quiet no mas. Other times it's a breakthrough that shifts everything. Whatever it is for you today, honor it. You're not alone on this path. If this episode resonated, please share it with an hermana hermano, a prima primo or a comadre who needs to hear it too. Leave a review, hit, subscribe and let's keep building this healing comunidad together. Till next time, keep embracing your raices, reclaiming your esencia and walking your path Pa dentro y pa fuera.